There are times when I’m unable to attend a family function. No matter the legitimacy of my reason, my not being there becomes a matter of drama and all sorts of accusations are thrown about as to the real reason why. They are all liars to the core, so someone being morally opposed to lying even with having no track record of proven lies, is an impossibility to them.
When I am able to attend a family function it’s honestly worse. I am clearly the unwanted outcast in the room. The loser who the cool kids are letting sit at their lunch table out of obligation, but still not talking to. I am so clearly not one of them and it’s painfully obvious they don’t want me there.
Damned if I show up. Damned if I don’t.
At lunch this past Saturday my oldest sister told a story, and I knew similar stories had been told of me in my absence. When her now (most recent) ex-husband was in rehab he kept a journal. When he came home his loving and supportive wife stole it, read it, and mocked him. She was telling us about how he didn’t like about himself how he couldn’t grow facial hair so of course she always after would mock his smooth face. He is currently growing a mustache, which she noticed last week and immediately upon seeing it began laughing in his face about his face. She now daily contacts him to make fun of his facial hair.
First, there was absolutely no reason to bring up her ex-husband. Just let it go. Second, the enjoyment she gets out of being cruel is astounding.
And they seem to despise me just as they do her ex-husband. They tell stories about me and no matter what I do I am mocked. They hate me on principle. My immediate family is mostly narcissists and narcissistic sociopaths, and then this free-spirit me was born and that infuriates them. It’s one thing to not naturally fit into their mold, but I refuse to even try to cram myself in and for that crime I am forever an outcast.
thebadgerspath.com 